Scientists Have Discovered Where Native Hawaiians Came From, And The Genetic Effect of Their Long Voyage

It took approximately 4 billion years of cumulative evolution to make modern humans, but it only took us 0.000075 of that immense span to settle the entire globe – including (kind of) Antarctica, thanks to the invention of high-capacity poo incinerators. Our innate intrepidity and ants-in-the-pants-iness have driven us across scorching deserts, the rarefied air atop jagged mountains, and slashing through jungles.